it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
