shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
