He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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