The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
