I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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