yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Randomize
