She's JV to your varsity
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Randomize
