I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
