I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
