Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
i now understand why vodka
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
