how can u be prego again
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
But theres a keg here and me gusta
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Randomize
