You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
