did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
If that was your dad, he is hot
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Randomize
