woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize
