lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
