I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Randomize
