You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
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