But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
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