just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
