Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
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