You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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