the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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