just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Still dying that you shit outside
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Randomize
