Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize