I heard we made out
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Randomize