I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
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