True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
We need a shit load of segways right now
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
