even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
