ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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