Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
nutella sex= disaster
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
