if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize