Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Randomize
