There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Randomize
