You made me cry and you don't even care
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Randomize
