capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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