I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize