Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize