return my video game
I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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