It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Randomize
