Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
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