morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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