i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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