omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Randomize
