Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
