I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
