what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
