I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
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