Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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