We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
