TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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